My ancestors must have been in a "Witness Protection Program"

All real library "finds" are made five minutes before closing, when the copier is broken.

More Definitions of a Genealogy Addict:

You go on vacation and beg your spouse to please drive 80 miles out of the way so that you can try and find your grandfather's grave in 100 degree heat.

Youthful fantasies of traveling to exotic places are replaced with plans to get to those little towns with graveyards, or larger towns with Archives!

Your fear of snakes and bugs is overshadowed by the need to get through those brambles to that old gravestone.

Your kids think picnics in cemeteries are normal or that EVERYBODY does it.

You're the only person in the bridge/poker club who knows what a Soundex is.

"It is only a few miles down the road" means at least 50.

Some of your best friends live over 200 miles away.